Fugdale’s Funhouse

Review: There’s gold in them thar hills! It’s your job to mine it out. You play as an old bearded miner who sits at the top of the screen with a swinging claw. Below you, buried in the layers of terra firma, lie various sized chunks of gold, ore and diamonds. As your miner swings his claw toward a chunk you want to collect, press the down arrow key and he will drop the claw and grab it. He takes longer to reel in the larger chunks, but they have a greater value. Gray rocks don’t command much money, so try to avoid those if possible.

You get a target amount of money for each level and you must collect enough gold, rocks, or diamonds to match or beat that amount. You can also collect grab bags which contain random cash or special items. Although the target goal increases steadily with each round, the money you collect will carry over, so the more you can mine in each round, the easier time you will have meeting your next goal.

Additionally, after each round you will visit the general store, where you can use some of your earnings to purchase helpful items. Dynamite allows you to blast undesirable objects you grab by accident; Clovers increase the value of grab bag items; Strength Drink allows you to drag heavy items faster; the Book of Rocks increases the value of rocks; and Diamond Polish increases the value of diamonds. Different items become available as the game progresses and sometimes you may want to curb your spending habits in order to keep some money in the bank for the next round.

Along the way various critters show up and crawl about the screen. They have value like anything else you mine, but tend to just get in the way. However, sometimes the creatures carry diamonds with them, in which case they provide lucrative rewards upon capture.

The game mechanics won’t win any awards for excellence. Your attention to timing and aim will increase your score. The hit area on each target seems liberal enough that you don’t have to tear your hair out while racing against the timer. However, later levels get a little more difficult as more useless rocks and animals get in your way.

If you enjoy the basic version of this game, you can increase and extend your fun by downloading the full version. The full version includes pesky bats and elves; more items; more levels and even a gambling game to increase your money.

Review: Do you have a famous person out there whose face you’d like to see with a bulls-eye painted on it? I know nearly everyone has fantasized about throwing darts at someone’s face. Now you have the chance. Although to score well in this game of target practice, you really should avoid hitting the famous celebrity. Just like in a knife thrower’s act, you play as one of two knife throwers and you send your daggers hurling through the air towards a rotating wheel. Of course, your assistant, a celebrity of your choice, lies strapped to the rotating wheel presenting you with something to avoid (or not) as you throw.

Spattered around your celebrity, you will see 20 tiny red numbered targets. You get 20 knives and to score perfectly you must hit each of the targets preferably in order. This task seems next to impossible as the wheel rotates pretty quickly, but you will have fun trying and missing, because if you miss, you may “accidentally” hit the celebrity and they will scream in pain (or just die).

The fun of this game really lies in the vicarious torture of various public figures. You have several to choose from including George W Bush and Condoleeza Rice. But, for all your Republicans out there, you can also go for movie celebrities like Brad Pitt and Kirsten Dunst. Everyone seems to want to throw Britney Spears under the bus these days. Why not just thrown daggers at her instead?

As an added touch, before you play, you can choose whether you want to add more blood to the gore effects, so this game will appeal to all the sadists out there as well.